Functional Order: Ne-Ti-Fe-Si

Josef has a witty comeback for every situation, and needs zero time to think about it before he cracks a sarcastic or witty joke. When confronted with Mick’s ongoing obsession with Coraline and his belief that his friend should “get over it,” Josef tells an old myth with symbolic meaning as a precursor to illustrate his point. He keeps the larger picture in focus at all times; when Mick’s identity is compromised, both he and Beth understand the necessary action, for the “greater good” (eliminating the threat). Josef reads between the lines with many of Mick’s motivations; he accurately pinpoints Mick’s feelings for Beth and his ex-wife. He makes ruthless business deals – and both wins and loses millions on “gambles.” Ah, yes, the past. “You’ve never been chased by a torch-bearing mob.” Josef brings up his former experiences a lot. He doesn’t like to talk about his mistakes, but he does place certain emphasis on particular times (“82, a VERY good year”). Josef has a lot of trouble getting over HIS ex as well; he’s very sentimental about her, and has a “long standing” once a decade or so “booty call.” He is notorious for not wanting to be physically engaged in his environment; when Mick challenges him to break into a house, Josef whines, “Can’t we hire someone to do this?” – then nearly falls off the roof, and immediately sits down once he gets inside. He hires people to do his dirty work. The rational solution may not always be the moral one, but it is always rational – and Josef thinks of it before Mick does. He wants to know why Mick didn’t just kill a murderer rather than feeding on him, since it doesn’t make sense from a rational standpoint not to eliminate a threat in a quick, easy fashion without endangering oneself in the process. He uses threats to establish his dominance in business relationships. He analyzes Mick’s romantic feelings, his impressions of Beth, and his own relationships. He often heads straight into “fix it” mode, and inevitably winds up at “kill the problem, now.” He has no qualms about murdering someone, to keep Mick’s secret, when Beth asks him to do it, but first wants to make sure she understands the moral implications of what she is asking (“You KNOW how I’m going to handle it, right?”). Mick’s abstinence from drinking blood from the source makes zero rational sense to him, so he refuses to accept it and warns him that it will have eventual consequences. He relies on his charm much of the time to get him out of sticky situations; he banters with Mick, and doesn’t take much personally (“I’m your only friend who doesn’t just like you for your money,” Mick shoots at him; Josef bats back, “Sad, but true”). He is good at sensing Mick’s emotions, and is concerned about them; he worries about Mick’s emotional state, and tries to convince him that his ex-wife is “bad” for Mick. He pauses to explain himself to Mick while making threats on the phone (“This is the only way to deal with these people”). When Mick asks Josef to turn him back into a vampire to save Beth, Josef initially refuses out of fear Mick will hate him for it, but then submits because it’s both rational and what Mick most wants. He scoffs at his friend’s morality (“I know you have morals and scruples and all of that, and it’s fine, sorta”) since he doesn’t really have a fixed one of his own. Josef frequently tries to get Mick to “violate his moral code” (by offering him freshies).

Enneagram: 7w6 sp/sx

Josef loves to have a good time and sees no reason to deny himself anything – he keeps freshies on hand to feed off of, often goes to places where he can indulge his bloody desires, and is easily bored. He is competitive in business, a successful bluffer who warns people not to cross him (and who is willing to order someone’s death, to save Mick), and … sometimes reckless in how he indulges himself. When pretending to be dead, Josef invites girls over to the apartment for a massage and “fun.” He’s forever trying to loosen up Mick and get him to compromise his more rigid behaviors, but he can also be cowed when Mick gets angry at him, tells him off, or puts him in his place – because his 6 wing does not like to be disliked or in conflict with the people he cares most about. He’s unable to be aggressive in person with his ex, and has to rely on Mick to do it for him.