Function Order: Fi-Se-Ni-Te
Dean prioritizes his own feelings over group harmony; there are many times when he reacts out of what he is feeling, rather than doing what might be seen as socially appropriate, from him chasing down Rory on the bus because he wants to spend time with a pretty girl who catches his attention, to brawling in public over her with Jess, without thinking about where he is or the embarrassment he is causing Rory. When he and Rory have a brief affair after his marriage, Rory tries to stop him by asking about his wife; Dean dismisses her involvement by saying he has tried with her, but she just doesn’t understand him. He has given up and wants the woman he loves, who has always made him happy – a judgment that comes from himself (Fi) whereas Rory’s Fe concerns itself with putting other people first. It’s hard for him to put his own feelings aside to do things, but he will do them if it makes other people he cares about happy (like agreeing to go with Rory to the dance at Chilton, even though dances “aren’t my thing”). Dean is hard-working and impulsive, offering her free pop the first time he sees her at the market to get to know her, following her on the bus to a stop that isn’t his to introduce himself, and making himself useful around the house. Lorelai likes it that he can repair anything from the porch to a missing light bulb, and thinks he’s the perfect boyfriend for a long time because of how useful he is around the house. Dean builds Rory a car and proudly gives it to her, but becomes defensive about it to her grandfather, when he implies it might not be safe. To prove it to Richard, he has the man drive it to a shop and get it checked out; when Richard is impressed, Dean tells him he would never do anything to “endanger Rory.” He quickly gets involved with another girl after Rory and he break up over Jess, and marries her without thinking too seriously about it. Dean shows some tert-Ni in sensing that Jess is going to be a problem, and what he is up to in his ‘innocent’ interactions with Rory. He doesn’t like where it’s headed, so he tries to stop it in its tracks (unsuccessfully). He can be somewhat cutting and rude under stress, such as when he confesses his feelings to Rory and she’s hesitant to respond in kind, he makes fun of her pros and cons list, before storming away and refusing to speak to her. When she tries to apologize at one point after a fight, he shuts the window in her face and pulls the curtain, signaling he doesn’t want to talk.
Enneagram: cp 6w7 sx/sp
Dean wants Rory to be safe, but has unfortunately developed a tendency of possessiveness in the process—he can be over-reactive on her behalf, somewhat temperamental, and defensive, suspecting the worst of Jess and being right about his intentions. He becomes defensive when Rory’s grandfather looks down on the car he has made for her, and insists on taking it to a garage to prove to him that “I would never let Rory drive around in anything that isn’t safe.” He becomes quickly jealous when Rory spends time with Jess, and even after they are broken up, remains emotionally attached to her, and sees her as his to protect. After Rory runs out of a party in tears, Dean and Rory have a fight that gets so intense, someone calls the cops to break up the party. Though loyal, Dean can also be quarrelsome and confrontational. He has a mischievous sense of humor, a desire to be liked, and a tendency to rush into another relationship to avoid the pain of loss—showing his 7 wing’s dislike of dwelling in unhappiness for every long, and escapism. Dean even escapes from his failing marriage by pursuing Rory again, someone he has romanticized into a place of escape.