Function Order: Si-Fe-Ti-Ne

Sally is a meticulous girl who wants a fairly normal life, even though she doesn’t admit it to herself right off the bat. She assumes that she and this guy will be together for a long time, because they both want the same sort of life – one free and without limitations. But then, when a kid said “family” on an outing one day, she burst into tears and realized—she wants one, a marriage, a commitment, a lifelong, grow old together life. She has had a couple of changes of career, and evolved along with it, but still remembers things strongly from the past and is upset with herself for forgetting her former close friend’s name (she is relieved to recall it, since that means she’s not a bad person after all). Sally easily talks about her feelings—whether that is to give her reasons why Ingrid Bergman left in Casablanca (and she would do the same), or to get defensive when Harry tells her she only thinks that way because she’s never had ‘great sex,’ or to call him up and have a melt-down about how her ex is getting married, and now she realizes it was all about not wanting to settle down with HER, and what’s wrong with me? She prefers to take things slow and for them to be meaningful, and can’t understand Harry’s careless attitude about sex and dating. She tries to understand him, but is also somewhat easily offended. She and him butt heads in a Si way, because she points out that ‘most women’ fake orgasms, and ‘most men’ think they are good lovers; ergo, which one is more true? She shows very little intuition – she doesn’t think deeply about philosophical subjects or want to move quickly, and she is upset when she finds out Harry feels like them sleeping together three weeks ago was ‘forever ago’ (why isn’t she over it yet?).

Enneagram: 1w2 sp/so

As Harry says, Sally is one of those “high-maintenance girls who thinks she’s a low maintenance girl.” What he means is, Sally makes life hard for everyone because she is so rigid and picky about what she does and does not like, and how she wants everything on the side, and hold this out of the menu. She will send things back if she doesn’t like the result. She wants things ‘just so’ and can be very critical of things, frustrated with relationships that don’t work, and judgmental of his behavior (she thinks he’s shallow for sleeping casually with people, instead of waiting to ‘make love when you mean it’). At one point, he gets exasperated with her for taking too long to feed letters into a mailbox, since she has to do them each individually and make sure it goes in ‘correctly.’ She is also preoccupied with falling in love, and finding someone to be with, and struggles mightily to work through her feelings for her ex. She says she’s over it, but she’s clearly not.

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