ESFP 3w4 Characters

Gwendolen’s sister complains, “She always gets what she wants!” and Gwen retorts, “It’s because I demand the best!” She’s very physically present and engaged in the environment, enjoying riding, hunting, shooting, and dancing (“I don’t see why the boys get to do so many things!”). She believes you should take big risks for big payoffs, or it’s not living at all; Daniel’s first meeting with her involves Gwen recklessly placing an enormous bet at the gaming tables. She’s opportunistic and engaged enough with the environment to be quick-witted, responding to things as they happen and somewhat caught off guard whenever Grandcourt “pauses” to think. She hates the idea of a tedious life as a governess so much, she’d rather pawn all her jewels. Gwen always brings things back to her, and her feelings; her mother says she never knows what her daughter is thinking, and it’s true, Gwen rarely opens up to her (she sends her out of the room, flounces off, or demands that her mother shut the other children up because “I cannot bear it”). When her family is destitute, Gwen makes it about herself and how much she will detest being a governess. She is often inconsiderate of others and their feelings (telling them not to touch her, denying them a dance, and laughing at her cousin’s dislocated shoulder though she’s apologetic about it), but she also struggles whenever she goes against her conscience. Gwen chooses to marry Grandcourt for financial gain despite having reservations about hurting his mistress and their children in the process (she feels a little reassured when her mother tells her “we can’t look after everyone, can we?”). Gwen starts out as self-centered and self-absorbed, but over time, becomes more generous, thoughtful, and aware of other people and their needs. She is emotional and sensitive to criticism, taking offense when someone tells her she will only be a “middling” musical talent (but then agreeing that it’s not worth the fuss). She can be pragmatic when she needs to be; she’s aware of the social repercussions of being a governess (a fall in status) and the benefits of marrying a man she does not love. She struggles overmuch with “learning to love people” instead of hating them; she sneers at first at romantic sentiment and affection, often mocking young men’s emotional overtures behind their back. Gwen isn’t very good at sensing the greater intuitive potential at people; Daniel’s choice in a wife blindsides her, since she assumed it would be herself; but she also knows Mirah is a threat (she’s threatened by her, since Daniel speaks so highly of Mirah’s kindness and goodness) almost immediately. Gwendolen engages in futuristic thinking from time to time, but it mostly happens after she’s trapped in a hellish, abusive relationship – she starts seeking ways out, and latches onto Daniel as a potential collaborator in her escape.

Enneagram: 3w4

Gwen waves back and forth between being super-confident and aware of how things look to others (she says “one should not always be the best,” since it causes others to dislike you) and moody, self-absorbed, and emotional. She marries a man she fears and dislikes to get out of being a governess, putting her heart aside in the process, and winds up in a miserable and abusive marriage. Aware of Daniel’s disapproval when he catches her gambling, she finds it hard to ignore his opinions and even calls him out on it later. Gwen is often emotional and insecure, but covers it over with self-confidence and by “demanding the best” (insisting her uncle buy her a proper, pretty horse so she can jump and ride, trying out as a singer, and not taking criticisms personally). But she also has a moody 4 wing, which focuses on her own misery and unhappiness. “I cannot love people,” Gwen tells her mother, “I only hate them.” And indeed, she often focuses on what is wrong, absent, or out of reach (“I gambled,” she says at the end, “and in every way I have lost”). Gwen assumes she can control whomever marries her, but winds up being controlled – and rather than put on a happy face, she broadcasts her unhappiness to Daniel. Pointing out how miserable she is, lamenting she made the wrong choice, and admitting she feels “powerless” to do anything on her own behalf. She says she is not strong and needs someone else to rescue her. Gwen marries Grandcourt, and changes as she does some genuine soul searching; anguishing over her mistakes and flaws and trying to be a ‘good person’ even though it doesn’t come naturally to her, to think to make others happy or use her tragedies to make her kinder. She grows by the end of the story; she tells Daniel that she wants him to be happy, and she will now seek happiness by being generous to others.