The Nevers: Penance Adair [ENFP 9w1]

Function Order: Ne-Fi-Te-Si

Penance always looks for the best in everyone she meets, even a murderess like Maladie who tried to kill her. She is idealistic, believes in forgiveness and redemption and second chances. Unlike Amalia, she believes an execution is a larger commentary on their kind, on the Touched, and sees it as a public message warning women against what they can expect, as Touched who move out of line. She is also a brilliant inventor, a creative personality who busies herself with dozens of ideas for inventions at all hours of the day, comes up with prototypes overnight (many of which do not initially work), and has a wonderful mind for innovation. She comes up with dirigibles, horseless carriages, and can innovate something in a few hours or days that they need to handle their enemies (including a machine that spews out goop, to stop a fire-thrower from frying them both to a crisp). Penance is emotional and sweet, considerate of everyone but also firm in standing up for what she personally values. She doesn’t care what others say or if they support her quest to rescue a psychopath from a public hanging (and when there, she immediately figures out the reason for her suicide; saying she wanted them all there to witness her die, so she could kill them). She allows Amalia to be who she is, but also coaxes her to be less violent and more accepting, by expressing her annoyance with all the constant conflict around them. She comes up with and executes plans in short order, writing out schematics and detailed charts to give life to her ideas on paper. All of her inventions serve some sort of practical purpose in their lives, including a recording device, but she sometimes rushes to finish them and they misfire or don’t work. She shows little Si, except in her contentment in the workshop, her desire to move beyond the past and forget about it, and in her attentiveness to her personal hygiene (even if she works so hard, she neglects sleeping).

Enneagram: 9w1 so/sp

Penance is a sweet and even-tempered girl who hates conflict so much, she is always begging her best friend to be a peacemaker, or to talk about things rather than punching people. She hates violence and finds it hard to think ill of anyone; she won’t easily stand up for herself when others insult her or put her in her place. Penance is so forgiving, she doesn’t even hold a near-death experience against a murderess, and believes in her potential redemption and forgiveness. She thinks her execution would set a bad precedent and is cruel and unnecessary, a belief no one else holds. She often tries to calm people down and feels frustrated with dangerous or intense situations, since it disrupts her desire to be calm and ‘sensible.’ She believes in doing the right thing and will morally lecture people at times for holding attitudes she sees as callous or inappropriate.

The Nevers: Augustus Biglow [ISFJ 9w1]

Function Order: Si-Fe-Ti-Ne

Augie has one main interest, and that’s birds. He’s obsessed with them, can remember details about them to the extreme, and talks about them whenever he’s around anyone else. He finds it scary but also thrilling that his Touched gift is to be able to see through birds’ eyes and even control them in a group. He finds this alarming, because it’s so different from what he expects his life to be like—it’s “abnormal.” He is slow to grasp humor, although he does see the charm in Penance’s remark that if he escaped a sermon to go flying inside a bird, pity the poor bird’s mind stuck inside his body in the church and forced to hear a dull sermon! Augie is heavily reliant upon his sister and often tries to please her, even spurning the girl he feels attracted to when she tells him not to get friendly with the Touched. He cares enormously what others think about him, and hopes Prudence attracted no attention when she came through the main gate to confront him about his behavior. He desperately wants to be liked and has many opinions about the unscrupulous methods his best friend employs, but also goes along with things without objecting to them, to maintain his relationships. Augie loves to understand things and finds birds especially fascinating. He loves Prudence’s inventions, but shows no real creative thinking for himself. He can be somewhat traditional and reserved, though curious about the unknown. He doesn’t speculate on much of anything, but he cautions his best friend to be careful whom he crosses in his club, second-guesses some of his decisions later, and tries not to take risks.

Enneagram: 9w1 so/sp

Augie is rather too influenced by those around him and finds it hard to stand up for himself; he tends to be like whomever he hangs around, to some extent – drinking more and seeking distractions with Hugh, being more proper and concerned with public appearances around his sister, and more spirited and carefree around Prudence. He doesn’t want to cause conflict, have anyone disappointed in him, or upset anyone, so he represses anything he feels might get him rejected, including admitting to being Touched (he thinks his sister doesn’t know about it, which makes him feel relieved). He has a few firm views on right and wrong, will stand by his decisions once he has reached a firm one (choosing to support Amalia rather than Prudence, even though it disappoints the latter, because he thinks her quest is more worthwhile), and becomes more anxious and reactive whenever he’s stressed.

The Nevers: Mary Brighton [ISFP 9w1]

Function Order: Fi-Se-Ni-Te

Mary’s values all come from inside herself, and aren’t dependent on how others feel; she leaves Frank Mundi standing at the altar without an explanation, and later when they are reunited, though she’s sorry for having caused him pain, she doesn’t explain her reasons to him. She becomes uncomfortable when he asks  about them, and makes the excuse that she’s tired and needs to rest so he will leave. She also admits that she doesn’t really like it that she has shared ‘her song,’ since it used to be hers alone, her treasured secret; but she couldn’t stand by and let Maladie hurt anyone else, so she had to sing for them all. She is willing to do it again and call the Touched to them, to save them as she has been saved, and to bring them into its shelter. Her song is very much tied to her emotions; it only comes out of her when she is in the right frame of mind, and can’t be forced. Mary has aspired to be an actress all her life, despite already being too old to sing in the chorus (it’s enough to be there, and participate, to start fulfilling her dream). She manages to get the children away from Maladie, risking herself in the process, and strikes out at those who attempt to hurt her while she’s been kidnapped. She hasn’t much screen time to show her middle functions, but enjoys playing the piano and singing to showcase her happiness, and makes decisions based more in how she feels in the present rather than brainstorm or idealize with others. She has made a firm decision regarding Mundi and doesn’t go back on it when they are reunited. Mary becomes quite blunt and aggressive under stress, accusing others of being bad, wrong, losing their minds, and refusing to go along with their plans, even though mouthing off maybe isn’t the smartest thing to do when you can’t trust others not to hurt you.

Enneagram: 9w1 so/sp

When asked why she started singing at the opera house, Mary says she did it in the hope that it would reassure Maladie that she needn’t act only from pain, but that she could have hope for the future. Mary’s songs are all about hope and reassurance, and she believes that God is loving and kind, not someone who wants them to feel pain and suffer in anguish. She doesn’t like confrontation, which meant rather than tell Mundi that she didn’t want to marry him, she simply left him without an explanation. She politely infers that he should leave by saying she is tired when she doesn’t want to have a conversation. Mary is also affected by those around her, and wants to please them – she enjoys singing and playing with the girls, but then says she feels guilty for having fun and not working harder to recover her song; that she should do more for them. She believes in listening to her inner self, and in trying to be a good person, going so far as to volunteer to bring all the Touched to them with her song if it will help the situation.

Paid Request: Outlaw King: Elizabeth Burgh [ISFP 9w8]

Function Order: Fi-Se-Ni-Fe

Elizabeth is very straightforward about what she thinks, even when it’s not what others expect from her; when Robert asks her if she’s having a good time, she earnestly replies that she is ‘trying to’ (it’s not great). When she sees a soldier manhandling someone, she immediately asserts herself and uses her family name to order him to desist. She also tells Robert that she has decided to go along with whatever he chooses, in terms of becoming king or not; that she will make up her mind, set her course, and stay on it. She refuses to budge from it, even when Prince Edward demands she renounce her marriage. In tears, she finds it difficult to imagine such a thing, because she has fallen in love with Robert, and doing this is betraying him—so she refuses to do it, and accepts her punishment. She tells the prince that compassion is “not weakness,” but strength. Elizabeth acts on her feelings, like sharing her first kiss with Robert, but then has a firm boundary (it will go no further than this). She does not sleep with him until she feels ready and loves him, and even then does not talk about her tender feelings at all (she needn’t; it’s obvious through her actions). She tends to react instantly to things, in the moment. She enjoys traveling with his army, quickly befriends his daughter, comforts her, and seems to take pleasure in small things (such as eating an apple alone seated on a stairwell in their castle). Elizabeth also does not think much past the moment, or about the long-term potential consequences of her decisions; she intends to follow one path forward, and see it through to its end. But when she refuses to sign the annulment, she doesn’t think about anything other than her own feelings (not that it might hurt her family, for example) and those of her husband. Elizabeth also is rational enough to interpret accurately that the prince being so desperate to ‘save her life’ means that Robert hasn’t been captured yet, so there’s a chance they won’t find him and he might succeed—this makes her laugh and refuse to sign it. She is driven by her sense of right and wrong more than by her sense of logic, but is confrontational when necessary and purposeful in her actions.

Enneagram: 9w8 so/sx

Elizabeth is a blend of passivity and assertiveness; she doesn’t know anything about her future husband, but agrees to marry him, and then allows him to make most of the major decisions in their life together, including ones that could get her killed (or captured, or raped). She says she is fine with whatever he wants to do. But she will also rush into action to protect innocent people, and assert her feelings and thoughts, regardless of the situation. She sets firm boundaries; after their wedding night, in which he does not touch her, she knows it’s okay to keep him at a distance, so she gives him no sexual encouragement until she feels it is the right moment. She isn’t afraid of the prince that much, even though she’s seen him gut a man, and laughs in his face when he wants her to sign away her marriage and renounce her status as the Queen of Scotland. I went with so/sx, because she seems to devalue her own survival (sp-blind) in favor of merging and going along with Robert’s decisions.

Paid Request: Song of the Sea: Saoirse [INFP 9w1]

Function Order: Fi-Ne-Si-Te

Saoirse makes decisions independent about how others feel about them. Even though her brother is often annoyed by her presence, because she loves him, she hangs out with him. She feels drawn to the shell in his room and continues to borrow it without his permission (“stealing it” according to him). She pursues the little lights that blowing it brings to her, without thinking how her father might react to wake up and find her gone, wanders into the sea despite her brother’s objections, and generally follows her own instincts. She feels drawn to things that will reveal her true form, such as the shell, the lights, her selkie coat, the seals in the ocean, and the sea itself. She continues to move toward those things even when others attempt to stop her. Saoirse knows somehow that blowing the shell will make the owls go away. Saoirse also gives the food she doesn’t want to the dog, rather than make any pretense of eating it. She feels quite nostalgic about the mother she never knew, and asks her brother to read the old familiar stories to her. Saoirse also doesn’t want to leave her brother and father at the end for the unknown, a life in the sea with her mother, because she’s attached to them. As a mute, she cannot speak but once shows her displeasure with her brother by kicking him in the shins!

Enneagram: 9w1 so/sx

Saoirse is both able to block out other people, and in tune with their displeasure toward her – she becomes quite upset and offers to give back the shell when her brother becomes angry about it. She feels upset when he pushes her away and tells her to get lost, but then is quickly happy again as she walks into the tide. She is easily distracted, easily pleased, and easily allured by beautiful things that speak to her soul; she is part of nature and it is part of her. Saoirse tries hard to do the right thing and help out the faeries, her song restoring herself and her music bringing the faeries back to life from stone—even though it costs her all her effort and makes her faint.

Paid Request: Shang-Chi and the Legend of the Ten Rings: Shang-Chi [ISFP 9w1]

Function Order: Fi-Se-Ni-Te

Shang-Chi has a strong moral compass and a desire to protect his family; when he finds out his sister is in danger, he drops everything to rush home to China and warn her that they will be coming for her emerald pendant, the same as happened to him. He can’t stand by and allow his father to massacre an entire village when the truth becomes known to him of his intentions, so he defies him and rushes there to warn and protect them. He doesn’t tell much about his former life, or even his real name, to Katy until they are in China and it becomes necessary to reveal the truth about his past to her. Shang-Chi is also opportunistic and lives in the moment. Others accuse him and Katy both of never growing up, because they are still “playing” and being irresponsible as adults; both of them work jobs that are going nowhere, and stay out late at clubs, singing karaoke and partying, rather than getting any sleep (despite knowing they have to go to work early the next morning). Shang-Chi is a very physical man, observant and good in a fight; he uses his environment and reacts quickly to keep himself safe. He takes over a bus out of control and drives it, then calculates how best to bring it to a stop and guides Katy through the process, while having a fight in the back end of it. When they get trapped in a building under attack, he throws a chair out a window and helps her to safety by scaling a scaffold, unconcerned with the drop. He makes for a formidable fighter. He doesn’t show much Ni, other than his singular desire to stop his father from decimating the village; and he knows that his father is wrong, and his mother is dead, not trapped behind some mysterious gate. He can be quite blunt at times, strongly stating that his mother is dead, that she would hate what her husband is trying to do, and even that she would refuse to be with him, if she knew about this. He flies into direct action and doesn’t question things so much as to want to make sure they don’t go wrong. He also never reached out to communicate with his sister in the many years of their separation.

Enneagram: 9w1 so/sp

Shang-Chi tends to become invested in whatever others around him are invested in, whether that includes joy-riding a car all over town with Katy and then being “irresponsible” and hitting up a local club, or needing to protect his mother’s village from his father’s wrath and vengeance (and from the creatures let out of the hidden door). He is mild-mannered, easygoing, and doesn’t take things personally, gently correcting people like Katy’s grandma (“we’re just friends,” he says when she asks when they’re going to get married). He has been slow to develop any kind of a life for himself – years after he’s moved to America, he’s still just parking cars and he seems to have no real ambitions beyond that. His strong 1 wing gives him a sense of wanting to do what is right, and the will to stand up to his father – he tells him multiple times he is wrong and criticizes his behaviors as evil, even going so far as to say his mother would disapprove of these actions (“what makes you think she’d want to be with you, after this?”).

You’ve Got Mail: Kathleen Kelly [ESFJ 9w1]

Function Order: Fe-Si-Ne-Ti

Kathleen finds it almost impossible to wrap her head around the idea that business isn’t personal; everything, to her, starts by being personal. She’s also incredibly direct in how fast she processes and addresses her feelings – when someone causes her to have doubts about whether her bookstore can survive, Kathleen immediately talks about it to Frank and demands to know his opinion. She’s polite to Joe Fox when they meet at a dinner party (before she knows who he is), and a little offended at how rude he is to her (being brisk) – and then when she finds out his identity, marches up to the buffet table to confront him, where she tells him not to take the caviar, because it’s a garnish and it’s rude to do that. (She then proceeds to take some of it off his plate and put it back, so the hostess doesn’t get offended.) She mobilizes the citizens of New York against him, by using what he told her (comparing cheap books to cans of olive oil) in an interview, and by asking people to support her, as part of the small business owners of New York (“do you want to get off the subway and not even know you’re on the East Side?”). Kathleen shares almost everything with her coworkers, including being stood up (though she’s offended by that phase, since it implies negativity about herself); she asks for reassurance that he didn’t “take one look at me and leave.” Kathleen has a lot of sentimentality about her mother’s store, growing up there, and what it means to her, but is also more willing to move on than Frank – she accuses him of having multiple typewriters rather than moving on to computers. Kathleen cares a lot about the bookstore because it belonged to her mother and by being in it, she has kept a piece of her alive even after losing her. She has no problem going there day after day, building long-term relationships with the children of her customers, and being reliable. She writes mostly about what she sees and experiences to Joe, including one remark about seeing a butterfly on a train and how it reminds me of a book she once read (when shouldn’t it be the opposite; that books should remind me of real life?). She is so knowledgeable about books that she knows what will sell and what won’t, and has “immaculate taste,” as well as can recall details about who wrote what and when, and rattle off a list of books by individual authors. She is also somewhat caught up in what is in front of her – her immediate situation, facing the potential loss of her store, and evaluating Joe Fox based entirely on their previous interactions, which she found charming at first but then became hostile. She also has strong Ne, although it’s not very accurate (she thought Frank was the Unabomber). When Fox Books moves in around the corner, she naively hopes that “this will become the book distinct,” in the assumption that they can all share, that there is enough business to go around, and that her little store will have what the big one doesn’t (and vice versa, as her friend points out). She’s quite insightful in recognizing body language and emotional connections between people, such as when she sees Frank on a television show and notices the hostess coming on to him (“she’s touching herself… she’s sweating!”) and accurately guesses that he has fallen for her on the side, when he tells her he isn’t in love with her. She loves to trade banter and ideas, to think about the many different reasons her date might have stood her up, to speculate on the meaning of his name with Joe Fox… but Kathleen never once even considers the fact that perhaps her date did turn up that night. She has no idea that Joe is priming her to soften the blow, is clueless about why he’s trying to be friends with her, and doesn’t put the pieces together about what’s been happening until the end when he reveals his true intentions. She has separated her internet life from her physical life, and naively allows him to ‘guide’ her. She also never considered writing (unlike her INFP boyfriend) as a career until after she had all this ‘free time’ on her hands (and even then, she admits that Joe gave her the idea). Kathleen tries to understand what’s going on, and feels frustrated that all their campaigning hasn’t made any difference in saving her store. Kathleen also desperately wants answers when her date doesn’t show up, and asks him what happened. Under stress, she becomes way more harsh, judgmental, and nitpicking, being downright rude and even mean to Joe Fox.

Enneagram: 9w1 so/sp

Kathleen is a sweet and mild-mannered woman who hates conflict, and at first, finds it hard to find anything mean enough to say to the “bottom-dweller who recently belittled my existence.” Everyone likes her because she’s so amiable and good-natured; naively, she assumes Fox Books moving in won’t mean the end of her store, ignores the truth of the situation, and keeps insisting they are all right, it’s all going to be fine. Rather than talk about her dangerous financial situation, she distracts herself by putting up more Christmas lights. But she flickers back and forth between moving to 6 and being anxious (“She thinks my store is in trouble… do you think it’s in trouble?”) and remaining optimistic about the entire situation until there’s no solution but to shut her doors. Kathleen tries to be okay with whatever anyone else wants; she cares about politics because Frank does, and only admits that she doesn’t care that much when she’s already upset. She tries to do the right thing, wonders if she’s being a bad person or cheating on Frank with an online relationship, and tries to be firm. She can be ruthless when provoked – pushed too far, Kathleen starts lashing out angrily at Joe, criticizing him, putting him down, and blaming him for the loss of her livelihood (which is fair). She also feels guilty and horrible after being mean to him.

You’ve Got Mail: Joe Fox [ENTP 9w8]

Function Order: Ne-Ti-Fe-Si

Joe is a likable entrepreneur who says “it’s not personal, it’s business”; at first, he’s preoccupied with the idea of driving other bookstores out of business, then he meets Kathleen and feels bad about the idea that they might ruin her life, and close her little store, which has so many treasured memories of her mother in it. He waffles back and forth and is something of a witty idealist, writing letters full of single thoughts and observations about life, such as fall making him want to buy school supplies, and thinking about a bouquet of pencils. When he starts seeing Kathleen and gradually manipulating her into liking him again, he enjoys bantering back and forth with her ideas about what his own username might be (152 pock marks on his face, 152 moles removed, he must be fat, so fat a crane has to lift him out of his apartment, etc) – and he really cringes when she actually hits on the truth (“his address! No, he would never do something that prosaic!”). Joe is good at sizing up business-related tactics – at guessing accurately that Kathleen sells $300,000 worth of books in a year, given where her store is, their overall cost, etc. He tells her that when her business is on the line, to “go to the mattresses” and be brutal against whomever is trying to shut her down (not realizing he’s giving her encouragement to take him down in the process). He also has good/bad Fe, in the sense that when he uses it (in conjunction with his conflict-avoiding 9), he uses it well – he can be charming, flattering, and likable, easily connecting to Kathleen and to his brother and niece. But he can also use it to be a jerk – he shows up at their date to intentionally bait Kathleen, provoke her, and make fun of her, because he’s angry about her not being someone else. He insults her, but doesn’t feel good about her insulting him back – he’s offended, and then feels bad about what he said. He warns her, in an e-mail before he knew who he was talking to, that being able to say what you want to say, in the moment you want to say it, often leaves you with remorse. Joe remembers details about her life, pieced together from their e-mails, conversations, and his grandfather’s comments about her mother, but doesn’t show much preference for his own sensory comfort – he winds up moving out and living on a boat for months after breaking up with his girlfriend.

Enneagram: 9w8 so/sp

Joe is a jerk with a heart of gold – someone who waffles back and forth between being accommodating and avoiding conflict and who lashes out at people, causing it. He goes out of his way to conceal who he is at Kathleen’s bookstore, to avoid her being angry at him, but then later when they meet at a dinner party and she figures out who he is, he is mean to her – lashing out at her, diminishing her bookstore, and asserting his authority. After being upset that it’s her he was supposed to meet on a date, Joe gets so mad that he goes in there and intentionally upsets her, but even then, accuses her of being ‘mean’ to him and feels so bad after her insult, he leaves and then ghosts her, by not answering her next e-mail or sending her an explanation. He is mild-mannered and agreeable a lot of the time, but when he feels threatened, becomes aggressive and domineering – and then he does things he regrets, “Mr. Nasty comes out,” and he wishes he could fix it; he spends the last twenty minutes of the film undoing everything his 8 wing did to Kathleen, so they can be together. And even when he meets her in the park, he’s hesitant – concerned about how upset she might be.

Emily in Paris: Gabriel [ISFP 9w1]

Function Order: Fi-Se-Ni-Fe

Gabriel is highly emotional, but not overly expressive about it – he tends to act on his feelings more than spout them at people, such as when he and Emily spend the night together when they assume they might not be seeing each other again anytime soon. He is very caring and loving toward others, calling up Camille’s mom to make sure her father is okay after a bottle-opening mishap even though they are broken up (and everyone knows about it), but also awkward when caught in the middle between two women he likes. Gabriel has very set views about what he wants, and is willing to walk out of a situation rather than deal with it further, though he will compromise if the terms are agreeable to him (he agrees to stay on at the restaurant, if they will leave it a sit-down dining experience until 10pm, and after that turn it into a nightclub). He is all about food and sensory experiences, and has a lot to teach Emily about the taste, texture, and sensual side of food. He loves to prepare it and give it a unique presentation, and will spend hours immersed in the kitchen to create just one perfect dish. He brings her a beautiful cake for her birthday, he comes up with a lot of mini cakes at the last minute for a party because she asks him, and is unconcerned with time constraints. Gabriel has always wanted to own his own restaurant, but though he struggles with money, does not want to take charity from his girlfriend’s father; he would rather work with someone else, as an investor, and make his own way in the world.

Enneagram: 9w1 sx/so

Gabriel is mild-mannered and conflict avoidant. He doesn’t want to create too much of a fuss, but is also willing to stomp out of his restaurant and quit if it’s not up to his standards—he finds the loud, busy, music-infused restaurant too much for himself to handle, is upset that it’s not the way he wanted things (nice and quiet), and ducks out. When Camille yells at him and Emily for having slept together, Gabriel vanishes for a few days, and tries to come to grips with Emily seeing other people. He also falls back into a relationship with Camille, after being around her, because he just starts ‘merging’ into her once again; he does this despite his feelings for Emily, because he lacks the energy to pursue her as energetically as he could, if she wouldn’t keep rebuffing him (he listens to her and abides by her wishes, even if it’s not what he wants). He wants to do the right thing, and be good, but finds it easier to follow his passions and instincts.

Don’t Look Up: Dr. Randall Mindy [INTP 9w1]

Function Order: Ti-Ne-Si-Fe

Mindy has to make sense of everything, and understand everything; he is so rational, and intent on getting things ‘accurately,’ he stumbles over his words in an attempt to inform the president of what is happening, rather than get directly to the point (telling her the systematic order of what transpired, rather than “A comet large enough to destroy all life is going to hit the planet”). He often stops other people in order to correct the statements being shared, and becomes increasingly frustrated as the story unfolds to people denying the facts, refusing to listen to the expected consequences, or worse, trying to profit off a life-shattering event instead of taking action in an attempt to destroy the comet or divert it off its current path. He works in a highly theoretical field and is a renowned scientist, who hopes that the rest of the community can ‘peer review’ his work, reach the same conclusions, and then mobilize to do something to save the planet. He is also somewhat naïve, in that he trusts and becomes part of the establishment at first, in the assumption that he can work from the inside-out to prevent this catastrophic event. He gets caught up in what is going on and sucked into their schemes, only to do a complete reversal and turn on them, when it becomes apparent to him that they are shooting themselves in the foot. Mindy, late in the story, when it becomes apparent that they are all doomed, dives back into Si comforts – he abandons his high-profile life in New York to return to his family, bringing food and an apology to his wife in the hope of spending his last few living hours among his loved ones. Much of the story, however, pivots on him abusing and even falling into an inferior Fe grip out of stress. Mindy is socially inept from the start, blurting out things inappropriately and having anxiety about needing to learn to connect to his audience. With some media training, he becomes more confident and consolatory, but his inferior Fe constantly trips him up – he assumes a woman is in love with him who wants to sleep with him, and falls in love with her in turn (blurting out that “I thought I was in love with you!” – which she finds “Oh, that’s… nice”). When his wife turns up to accuse him of cheating on her, he mutters that it’s “complicated” and doesn’t want to talk about it. Later, he assumes if he shows up with roses, an apology, and food, she will let him back into the house, rather than truly understanding the emotional devastation he has caused her; likewise, when she admits she slept with someone else while they were dating, he is unbothered by it, because that means she understands him now and they can just move on! The more anxious he becomes, the more emotional he becomes – he loses his cool on live television and screams at everyone; he makes an appearance on a children’s show and proclaims loudly that their parents should be freaking out, because “we’re all going to die!” (rather than being aware that terrifying children is inappropriate and unnecessary). Instead of working on solutions (at this point, it’s inevitable), he just becomes hysterical and loses all sense of his limited emotional awareness.

Enneagram: 9w1 so/sp

Mindy absolutely hates any kind of conflict; it causes him to spiral into anxiety and have panic attacks. When his wife turns up in his hotel room to yell at him for cheating on her, he almost totally shuts down, is cowed by her, and shrinks away from her. When others angrily discuss the comet and what’s happening in the White House, Mindy finds it hard to follow their rapid conversations and becomes confused and upset that they have moved past the issue and are ignoring it. Mindy is more likable than Kate because he’s so mild-mannered and pleasant most of the time. He’s prone to merging into people and going along with their agenda – he cheats on his wife after a 30 year marriage because a woman comes on to him, then assumes he is falling in love with her and that she feels the same way; even though he doesn’t like the government’s response, he goes along with it and becomes ‘part of the machine’ until he has a very public rage-meltdown on television. He completely loses his temper, like a kettle boiling over, and screams at everyone. Under stress, he moves more up his line to 6, insisting on ‘peer reviews,’ consulting other scientists for what they think, and asking for ideas. He wants to do what is right, but finds himself molding himself to fit others’ agendas a lot of the time, until he finally gets fed up enough to defy the authorities.

The Green Knight: Gawain [ISFP 9w1]

Function Order: Fi-Se-Ni-Te

Gawain is not a healthy young man, in that he is primarily self-absorbed and preoccupied with his own feelings – the entire story revolves around his inability to realize that he needs to give back, rather than just ‘take’ all the time – it’s one of a lack of reciprocity in which he assumes he owes no one anything for what they give him – he does not owe the woman who loves him a marriage and security in exchange for her heart and body; he does not owe the knight who rescues him from dying alone in the woods his loyalty or the ability to reject his wife’s adulterous advances; even when he meets a ghost, he does not assume he should do something for her in return for his ‘wish’ – it takes the entire journey and his endless, foolish mistakes (such as not assuming he owes the boy who gave him directions more than a menial coin for his efforts – which gets him beaten and robbed) for Gawain to finally find the root of his moral conscience, which is to keep his word and not be a coward. He is primarily centered in the present as well; he does not question things nearly enough, but takes them at surface value – despite the Knight telling him that whatever stroke Gawain lands, he must repay in kind in twelvemonth, Gawain strikes his head from his shoulders, then wastes the twelve months in-between drinking and womanizing rather than doing anything of importance. He is shocked when King Arthur tells him it was no Christmas ‘game’ and sends him out on his quest to repay the debt, possibly with his life. His foresight is poor in that he trusts the boy he meets in the woods, then the knight he encounters at the castle; he goes on to sleep with the man’s wife, because he feels like it in the moment. His only flash of insight is when he sees what his life could be, while making the decisions of whether to surrender it to the Green Knight or not. Gawain is direct and ambitious; he sees the Knight’s presence at the Christmas celebrations as a way to make a name for himself, and accomplish something heroic, but he can also be abrasive when he’s angry and lash out at people (or at his fox companion, when the creature tells him something he does not wish to hear).

Enneagram: 9w1 sp/sx

Gawain seems to be torn between over-merging into other people, and going along with whatever they want him to do without question, and attempting to find his courage and nobility within himself. He wastes a lot of his life drinking and whoring, while wishing he could be a better person and more noble knight; he is often angry, but finds himself fearful under stress – such as when he sees his life pass before his eyes if he does not keep his promise to the Green Knight, and how it will all come to nothing. In that moment, he chooses to embrace the goodness that his 1 wing desires, and abandon his own sensual desires (to live, to reproduce, to attain glory, rather than do what is Just). Even though he owes the knight much who takes him into his home, heals his wounds, feeds him, and even frees his fox servant, he still sleeps with the man’s wife simply because she comes on to him – adapting to her desires for him. His sin is that he has never pursued anything meaningful for his life, until it came knocking at his door through the mechanisms of another (his mother).

Paid Request: Blade Runner 2049: K / Jo [ISTP 9w8]

Function Order: Ti-Se-Ni-Fe

Jo is orderly and systematic in how he approaches information; he wants to go through it slowly, compile it, and test it for whether it holds up before he operates on it. He is instinctively curious and also highly aware of and in tune with his environment, spotting clues others miss (like the inscription on the tree, almost buried in the dirt, or wondering why someone would keep a dead tree in the first place, when someone else brings it up). He easily problem-solves and takes risks, by throwing himself bodily into action, pursuing every lead that might solve the mystery of where the ‘robot-born child’ went, or even shed a clue into his own past. But he also takes things too much on a superficial level and considers no alternatives; even though he has proof of being a robot in his preconditioning and how easily he can repair himself, Jo still considers the fact that he might have been ‘born’ rather than created. Once convinced that his memory is real, he follows it to find proof – and then assumes he is the chosen one, the child born, without considering other possibilities (like the memory being planted in his head by the person who actually lived it). He becomes convinced of one reality, one goal, one explanation, and follows it wherever it leads. His Fe is mild-mannered and tolerant, has a ‘we’ sensibility in how he sees himself as part of a greater whole, and is generous to his holographic girlfriend, to the extent of not wanting her to act out any feeling that isn’t authentic to her, while going along with all of them. He saves up his money to make her transportable and ‘real’ – so he can take her along with him on his adventures, and objects to the idea of wiping her from his home’s main frame, because then if anything happens to the holographic stick, she will ‘die.’

Enneagram: 9w8 sp/sx

Jo has a surprisingly pleasant way about him, in that he approaches those he’s supposed to bring in for reconditioning and politely asks them not to fight him, since it will be much easier on both of them if they will come peacefully. They don’t, so he has to beat them up or kill them and extract their eye as proof of the deed being done. He has a passive, mild manner about him, approaching subordinates with respect and not wanting to get on their bad side, avoiding direct confrontations, and finding peace at home through engaging in a virtual-reality relationship rather than a real one (though when she wants to merge into a third person for a “threesome,” he amicably complies). He even tells her she need not tell him that she loves him if she doesn’t want to, in the midst of their relationship. His 8 wing comes out under threat in how he calmly, competently handles anyone who tries to get the best of him, shoot him, steal his ‘ride,’ or otherwise gets in his way, even if it means slowly suffocating an enemy to death by holding them underwater.

Love Hard: Josh Lin [ISTP 9w1]

Function Order: Ti-Se-Ni-Fe

Josh is an inventor, who came up with his own line of candles based on masculine scents – to, as he puts it, cover up the smell of a bong in someone’s house, but he feels insecure about putting himself forward and selling them in his father’s store, out of a fear of his father’s rejection of his ideas. He decides to perform an experiment, and use a local friend’s photo on his profile, to see if that gets him better success with women – and he goes from having no one interested in him, to having almost a hundred women contact him. He makes friends with Natalie and wins her over, never thinking about what might happen next, the fact that she will expect to meet him, or that she might turn up on his doorstep. He is incredibly impulsive and reactive – for the good (he reasons that she needs a shot to keep her from dying after she has an allergy attack, so he takes her to the vet’s office since “the hospital is thirty minutes away”) and for the … uh… well, let’s just say he proposes to steal the limelight from his brother, never thinking that his family might spread it all over town, and jeopardize Natalie’s attempts to get to know a guy. He makes up lies on the spot, such as saying she’s his cousin, and offering to help her win over another guy, if she’ll pretend to be his girlfriend for a week. He does mostly sensory things in his spare time, such as rock climbing, exploring different scents for his candles, outdoorsy stuff, and posing for photos with props (“women like manly men, so this one shows I can fix things”). Josh isn’t aware of emotional repercussions, and never thinks that Natalie might get upset with him when she finds out she’s been had; he doesn’t know how to react when she gets upset with him, other than to offer to help her, to make up for his mistake. He also wants his family’s approval and attention, but isn’t sure of how to get it.

Enneagram: 9w1 sp/so

Josh has a problem of… not taking up space, being too shy to put himself forward, and hating conflict. He has spent years ignoring how angry he is about how his brother steals the limelight from him constantly, puts him down every time they meet by making nasty remarks about his looks, his talents, and how he lives at home – and he has done nothing about it, refused to stand up for himself, and tolerated far more than he ought. Natalie treats him rather badly when she finds out the truth, but he still tries to find her, to make sure she’s okay, then helps her out. He forgives her after she insults him in front of everyone, by telling them that he cat-fished her, and still dates her. He hastens to make sure she’s okay when she collapses, and talks her down off a wall climb. His 1 wing also starts to kick in, as he feels bad about misleading her, about the lies she seems to be telling, and is especially upset at the idea that she might violate her ethical beliefs and eat meat just to keep some guy happy – it’s a lie, and he’s sick of them!

Oscar and Lucinda: Oscar Hopkins [INFP 9w1]

Function Order: Fi-Ne-Si-Te

Oscar is a sweet and tender young man, forever torn between his desire to live according to his moral principles and the beliefs he has chosen for himself, and to avoid conflict with other people. He leaves his father’s house when he decides he must be wrong on a matter of doctrine, and refuses to go home. Though others press him to know the secret of his wealth (gambling), Oscar is reluctant to tell them for fear of condemnation and disapproval. He wants to maintain a good relationship with both his mentor and his father, and not disappoint either of them. When caught up in his guilt about gambling and shame about it ruining his reputation and losing his position, Oscar simply stops talking to people. He avoids Lucinda, and confesses to her only after she confronts him that he’s afraid that she will entice him into gambling once again. He falls into himself after killing a man in self-defense. Oscar accidentally prompted the confrontation by offering to gamble with his bonus, after the man has killed a bunch of natives on the trail. After he is raped while half-unconscious by a woman, Oscar blames himself for her ‘seduction’ and decides he must marry her, even though his heart lies with Lucinda. He’s easily offended when others call him “odd-bod” over his peculiar little habits, such as categorizing his possessions (all of his collections) by color and size (including his mother’s buttons). Oscar becomes quickly captivated by new ideas—and often trusts things outside himself to make decisions for him. He relies on luck and chance, the flip of a coin to decide his fate, even when he’s terrified. As a child, he believes God speaks to him through a game of chance. He tells Lucinda that he doesn’t think God will “look down on a poor chap making a wager” on a game of cards, after “asking us to gamble our immortal souls on his existence.” Then he quickly reverses his position, and says it might be blasphemy to say such a thing. Oscar assumes that Lucinda is in love with Reverend Hasset rather than asking her outright, and gambles on his ability to earn her love through delivering her glass church into the wilds. It’s his rather unrealistic proposal that they send him a glass church in the first place, and go overload rather than by river.

Enneagram: 9w1 so/sp

Oscar has a dual nature of being both tender, forgiving, and conflict-avoidant, and trying desperately to live up to a higher moral ideal. He is somewhat permissive and creates scenarios in which he can gamble without feeling guilt, until some incident triggers his fear of hell and of doing wrong—then he becomes repentant for a short time, only to lapse back into his gambling addiction. Oscar does not like to think he has harmed Lucinda’s reputation, but also doesn’t apologize to her for collapsing in her room and forcing her to call a steward. He gets caught up in his head and forgets all about the outside world, preoccupying himself in pleasant small activities (such as micro-organizing things and yes, gambling). He also wants to be principled and do the right thing, whether that involves taking responsibility that isn’t his for a seduction that happened against his conscious will (he sort of just… let it happen, and then reframes it in a 9ish way into his fault) or making amends for his mistakes.

Paid Request: Pocahontas: Pocahontas [ISFP 9w8]

Function Order: Fi-Se-Ni-Te

Pocahontas allows her own feelings to guide her, even when they go against her loved ones and her culture. At the climax of the film, as she rests her neck upon Smith’s to be crushed by her father’s weapon, if he so chooses, she tells him that this is where her path has brought her; and now he must decide what he will do. She has made her decision, is willing to die for it, and this inspires him to change his mind, release Smith, forgive the death of one of his warriors, and bring them all to peace. Pocahontas cannot go against her heart; even though she loves and wants to please her beloved father, the ‘slow and steady path’ does not interest her. It’s not for her. She listens to her heart, trusts it, and establishes a bond with Smith that soon turns into love. She is super aware of her environment and loves to immerse herself in it – raging the rapids, swimming, teaching Smith to notice and care for the animals, leaping off a cliff into the river and then throwing her friend off a boat, rescuing her hummingbird friend from drowning (she notices him underwater where no one else does), and loving the river because ‘you never step into the same one twice, it’s always moving, always flowing, always changing.’ She craves new experiences and to see new lands, saying she would like to go to London and view the houses and the court. She is forever climbing trees and following settlers around, sneaking out in the middle of the night, slipping away through the corn fields, and leaping into action. Pocahontas, however, is unable to understand her own intuitive insights; she dreams of a spinning arrow which later reveals itself to be Smith’s compass. She turns to Grandmother Willow for advice on how to interpret it, but knows that it is somehow important, she must follow it, and listen to it. She has a deep spirituality that connects her to all life, and enables her to understand that making peace with Smith and the settlers is the right thing to do. She knows her “dream means something, I just don’t know what.” Under pressure, Pocahontas becomes forceful and blunt. She angrily tells off Smith for being prejudiced against her people, calling them a savage (because it’s an insult to her, and to those she loves), and tries to attack Thomas for killing Kocoum.

Enneagram: 9w8 so/sp

Pocahontas feels constantly torn between doing what she wants to do, independent of what others want for her, and her own need to listen to and obey her father. Even though she finds Kocoum to be too dull and ‘serious’ for her taste, she still wonders if she should take the smoothest course, ‘steady as the beating drum,’ just because her father suggests it. She is open-minded and tolerant where others are fearful, aggressive, or automatically assume the ‘white man’ is their enemy. She patiently teaches John Smith about their laws, and encourages him to embrace the native teachings that ‘every rock, and tree, and creature, has a life, has a spirit, has a name,’ rather than approach them with distrust and violence or through seeking to take from nature whatever they want. She becomes angry easily, such as when John Smith infers that their homes are not good enough, thus implying that they are only happy with them because they don’t know any better; when he accidentally uses the word ‘savages,’ she storms away from him without speaking to him further that day. She knows in her gut that what her father has decided to do is wrong, so she is willing to die to save Smith—also trusting that he will make the right decision (and she’s right).